What a Noob! New English Teacher Thinks She Will Make a Liveable Wage
Awww, So Much to Still Learn
The new English Language Arts teacher recently hired at William Henry Harrison Middle School in Harrison, OH believes her new career will bring happiness, fulfillment, and financial security.
Sadly, Miss Jenkins is not prepared for the cold, harsh reality that this job might not actually help make her ends meet. In fact, it might even kill her.
She's so sweet.
In a conversation overhead in her school's faculty room, Miss Maura Jenkins told her coworkers that she is "really excited to start her career here" and looks forward to "giving it her all."
She's so innocent.
Furthermore, when she was asked what her plans are this weekend she said she was going to get her lessons ready for the week ahead.
Wait, no second or third job?
No, not right now. She wants to concentrate on her new career in education and put her all into her new job.
What a noob!
How will she eat? How will she shelter herself? How will she survive?
Sadly, Miss Jenkins, any many first-year teachers like her, are not prepared for the cold, harsh reality that this job might not actually help make her ends meet. In fact, it might even kill her.
So what should she be spending her free time doing if not spent lesson planning, grading, or partaking in professional development opportunities?
Um, how about surviving Maura! Get a side job that might actually help you pay your bills! Start waitressing, bartending, OnlyFans, even! We hear there's money in taking photos of your feet. Do you have weird feet? Even better! There's businessmen in China who will pay big bucks for a bunion or missing toe! Do something, anything else instead of trying to become a better teacher. You need to start planning for your future! Start finding another career you can transition to. This can't be it. It's a dead end! Save yourself!!!
Um, okay. Can I go now? It's my first day.