Just Working on My Craft, Says Writer Moments Away from Watching Funny Animal Videos
Putting In The Work
An aspiring author is getting herself motivated to put in the time and effort to get a big chunk of her manuscript written and then move on to the editing and revising stage. All she has to do is get inspired, stay focused, and dedicate herself to the process.
But wait, what's this? An alert from a new funny animal video from Rufus Goodboy, a channel she's subscribed to on Youtube?
Oh shit, the thumbnail looks bonkers? What the hell is wrong with that cat...but no, no, no, work first.
Okay, where was she?
Ah yes, the process. Working on the craft!
Let's see. She needs to finish this chapter with the big moment between the protagonist and his mother...that scene needs to be epic. It should have a lot more action but maybe also switch to the point of view of an impartial onlooker? That might be jarring for the reader, but if she can pull it off convincingly then it might bring a little much needed drama to the scene so it's not just two people talking....hmmm.... here goes...
But maybe she'll just see the first couple of seconds of the video. Is it mainly cats and dogs or are there other animals, as well? Oh shit, this one's got squirrels, it's so hard to find good squirrel videos!
But maybe she'll just see the first couple of seconds of the video. Is it mainly cats and dogs or are there other animals, as well? Oh shit, this one's got squirrels, it's so hard to find good squirrel videos!
But c'mon, she's got to get focused. Her new process involves getting out of the house to avoid distractions. She started going to different locations to write so that she could find inspiration and avoid interruptions.
Ok, she should get a coffee. She can always focus more when she has a beverage. Then she'll plan out some more plot points to help her structure the chapter.
Oooh shit, this coffee needs to cool down. Ok, she's going to just watch a little of that video while she waits. Not even going to listen to it. Going to turn the volume down and just watch a few of the clips. The audio will be her reward for finishing this chapter.
Oh snap, there's a monkey pulling a dog's tail! And it's a Great Dane! The dog is just taking it while the monkey tries to yank its tail off! Doesn't the Great Dane know that he is bigger? Hahahahahahaha he's dragging the monkey around the room!
Allright, that was hilarious, but now it's time for her to really work. That post she read on LinkedIn a few days ago said, "Get doing! Mastery is a long-term journey that never ends," and that's really inspiring. She wants to get that tattooed somewhere but it might be too long. She wonders what that would look like in Chinese symbols? Let's take a look...hmmm....nothing exact. Must be translating weird on Google. She'll have to ask my Asian friend later.
Ok! Where were we? Yes, she was working on pacing this chapter. Seems a little long right now. Maybe a flashback is needed to break it up? Yeah, maybe the mother can flashback to when she was the son's age and create that symbolic parallel. Yeah, that's freaking great, she freaking loves it. Let her write that down...
And click on this animal video again for a little bit. Wait, what's hiding under this blanket? Ooh, this is going to be good. Is it a raccoon? People in the south have somehow figured out how to train raccoons. Maybe a possum? That's even stranger. If she could have a weird animal pet it would probably be a fox. She'd name it Foxy Lady and whenever it walked I would do the "Doodoo whaw, doodo whaaaw 'FOXY'" from the Hendricks song....ehh, it was just a cross-eyed dog, kind of a let down. But a fox pet would be cool. People would be like, “There go those foxy ladies” when we walk at the park together. Let her see how much buying a fox would be...
Oh, only 15 states let you have a pet fox. Is her's one of them? Fuck! It's not. Dammit, she really wanted a fox. She would write little stories about it and become a children's author. She would take it to libraries for story time and all the little kids would pet it while she extolled all of her fox-ownership knowledge. She would write a book about raising it and training it. The middle of the book would have all these cute little photos of it like wearing bonnets or snuggling with her friend's babies, awwwww.
She should move. Ok what states allow foxes? Ugh, these are all east bumfuck. Oooooh, it says foxes make bad pets. They're high energy and aggressively mark their territory. Oh, hell no. And they scream like humans at night during mating season? What the hell? Ok, no fox.
Ok, she's wasted too much time. How should she get back on track and make this chapter meaningful? Maybe she should go back and watch that Neil Gaiman Masterclass again? He said something about a "well-structured chapter edifies us about the story to come." Ok, but how does she do that? She wants to go back to the video....
But she accidentally clicked the tab with the Rufus animal video again!
Oh damn, there is a rooster pecking at the camera lens! ROTFL!