A date that was going so well for a man in Ridgewood was abruptly over when the girl perused his bookshelf and saw all 22 books of the Redwall series.
To make it worse, the man doubled-down when he saw that she spotted the books, and proudly boasted that the novels were displayed in publication order, not chronological order:
"Many books contain character and storyline references from previously published works, and part of the enjoyment is seeing those mysteries unfold."
As you might expect, this “all or nothing” move proved quite costly, as the woman backed away slowly from the bookshelf. "Sooooo…it’s a fantasy series about a mouse?"
"I have all three seasons on VHS," he gloated. "The original Kaboom Entertainment tapes, not those terrible Sony Pictures Home Entertainment DVDs."
"Not just any mouse," he answered. “Matthias is an orphaned mouse who seeks a lost sword so he can fight off an evil rat army led by Cluny the Scourge."
As she quickly grabbed for her coat and bag, she tried in one final last-ditch effort to save the date when she asked if there was at least a series she could watch on one of the streaming platforms, like 'Game of Thrones' on HBO or 'Wheel of Time' on Amazon.
Here was the man's chance to cut and bail, either to lie and say he wasn't sure or quickly mention that Netflix is adapting it, but he hasn't really been following the development.
Nope.
Our mans just had to talk about the Canadian animated television series from the late 90s and then proceed to say that it is "really good" and ask if she wanted to stay to watch a few episodes.
"I have all three seasons on VHS," he gloated. "The original Kaboom Entertainment tapes, not those terrible Sony Pictures Home Entertainment DVDs."
Needless to say, the man spent the rest of the night alone, trying to jerk it to the part where Cornflower takes off her clothes to dress up as the ghost of Martin the Warrior.